The Green Queen

Oh my goodness gosh-ness gracious me, Patty is THE worst. I swear, it’s like she’s competing in the International Worst Olympics and is currently in the middle of a gold-medal-winning, record-setting performance. She’ll finish her routine (at being the worst), give a flourish to…

Servicing, Expanded

What a lovely Christmas that was! Went back to see the family in Chicago, and oh boy, when you get all of the McGees together it’s a sight to behold. Whether it’s sharing the news of the year over Christmas dinner, playing loud board…

Secret Meetings

I never thought I’d have to walk to a British Noblemen of Melbourne meeting, but here I am. Usually, I drive my Ferraron, making sure all the regular people know that I am a man of great importance, born into a rich family, descended…

Reversing Excuses

I think it’s time we got a reverse camera in our family car. I’ve been putting it off for a long time, but yesterday was simply too close for comfort. My wife is a decent driver, although she doesn’t like it. But reversing is…

Estate-Only Driving

Time for a jolly good slap-up breakfast, with lashings of salty sardines for all! This is all in celebration of me finally passing my driving test after the fifteenth attempt. Time for my driving skills to be unleashed upon an unsuspecting world, as opposed…

Tolerance on the Road

I really do hate to harp on about this one subject, but the road really isn’t made for spooky skeleton drivers. I try my hardest, partly because driving is fun and partly because I find the concept of a skeleton driving a car hilarious,…