No Hair to Style?

I know I’m a sentient robot and all, but I only just realised that Samuel is a sentient car. I probably should’ve cottoned on a bit sooner, what with how he smashed through the door into the classroom and how he looks like a car walking on its hind-wheels. Wow, his disguise is super great.

Naturally, this is the lesson where we learn about how humans have dedicated hair styling salons, Melbourne CBD fashion styles, and why humans pursue these things at all. My artificial shell’s hair does not grow back, so I cannot go for a haircut. Blartax and Glurt do not have hair, and neither do the new students. The 1600s time traveler won’t let anyone near his wigs, and no hairdresser today will work with such an old style. The wizards never cut their hair, despite living for many, many centuries. The skeleton… well, you know. Everyone knows.

Great! It’s a whole class full of people who’ll probably never go to a hair salon, learning about why humans go to see hairdressers, who work in hair salons. I suppose this one will be theoretical, because the Teacher cannot expect to give us a practical assignment. Then again, hair stylists are also a ‘thing’. I have hair, albeit of the artificial variety. I could always just go and get a hair styling, from a hair stylist, someone who styles hair.

We could have the talks, about life and if I went anywhere nice on my holidays. According to the educational video we watched, that’s most of what they do in hair salons, which sounds reasonable seeing as you’re draped in a strange shimmering poncho and cannot do much else. I will find a hair salon. South Melbourne must have them, as they do everywhere else. I will sit in the chair with the poncho, and try my hand at the ultimate test in making conversation.

At least I can sit in chairs, unlike Samuel the car over there.

-RW